Sunday, November 28, 2004

Sunday, November 28

Blue-state liberals hate the family and want to destroy it with equality for women and gay marriage; we red-state conservatives love our families

Jonas Luster of jluster.org recently went out of his way to stomp all over a good red-state conservative blog that we commented favorably on in a previous post, by Michelle Potter. Here's Jonas's comment:

After another evening of weblog surfing, I do have to ask - what is it that makes some of those weblogging conservatives such opinionated, unilaterally dismissive, zealots? I’ve run across the weblog of some girl, must be 24 by now, christian mother of two, who basically married the guy she cheated on her fiancé with, while he was living separated from his wife and his two children. Who has issues with “homoseksuals” and gay marriage, which is a sin and an erosion of that holy institution called marriage.

I hate to break it to you, kiddo, but you and your husband have done more damage to marriage as an institution than any faithful gay couple could do. And, guess what, every single one of my gay friends is more in tune with being faithful and respecting partnerships than you do.

Typical blue-state liberal point-missing! To spell it out for you, Jonas, the point you're missing is that Michelle writes about cheating on her fiance before she found Jesus. This is something that liberals never get: that all the stuff you do before you accept Jesus Christ as your personal Savior is wiped away and no longer counts, except of course as evidence of how much you've changed since you were saved.

Here is what Michelle writes:

let's start in november 2000. i was 19, and not unlike most other people i knew. a college drop-out, atheistic, liberal, poor morals, suffering from depression. i lived with my then-fiance and spent my free time at the rocky horror picture show. and cheated on my fiance. a lot, with pretty much anyone. i really had no clue why, either.

in december i met mark. he didn't seem too different from most of the people i knew. a little strange, with pink hair and random piercings. he was older, seperated from his wife, and had two kids who lived with his parents. to tell you something about me, i was mostly attracted to the fact that he tied to me a chair with twine. he, however, apparently fell in love with me.

at first i resisted. not that he was putting pressure on me at all, but i both really wanted him and really wanted to not cheat on my fiance again. but it wasn't long before we started a month-long affair that ended with me moving out of my fiance's house to "live on my own." and i really meant to do that, it's just that i didn't want mark to go home, yet. he never did go home...

by august i was pregnant. in december we got a bigger apartment and aryanna and aoghdan moved in with us. in april seamus was born. by may i was a basket case. (ok, maybe i was a basket case long before that.) going from a carefree life with my cool boyfriend in the "artsy" part of town to suddenly being a mother of three was a lot to handle. and then we decided to homeschool! my long-term, ongoing depression started to get really bad.

mark was a christian (kind of lapsed, obviously), and he had these christian parenting books. i read them, but i totally missed the point. i kept saying that they were really good, "except for all the god stuff."

when we got married the following september, we went to pre-marital counseling at a church pastored by one of mark's friends. not long after we got married we started attending that church. meanwhile i kept searching for a way to cope with my new life. eventually i ran smack into god.

i finally realized that i couldn't do this on my own. i needed god. and once i accepted that, it really helped. it wasn't a magic pill or anything, but as mark and i started becoming deeply involved in our faith, and changing our lives to fit a biblical model, things just clicked.

The important thing here, Jonas, is the sequence:

1. first she's depressed and sleeps around, cheating on her fiance and watching wicked movies, a liberal atheist with poor morals (BAD)
2. then then she meets Mark, with his pink hair and random piercings, and he ties her to the chair for purposes of extramarital sex, but she is (obviously!) still depressed (BAD)
3. then she moves in with Mark and gets pregnant (BAD), and even though she homeschools Mark's kids (GOOD) she's still depressed and living in sin (BAD)
4. then she and Mark get married and start going to church and find Jesus, and all is forgiven (VERY GOOD!)
5. and then she hates gay people and thinks that two men or two women living faithfully in holy matrimony will destroy the sacred institution of marriage (EXCELLENT!)

That's the difference, right there: once she's found Jesus and been transformed into a Daughter of Light, there's no contradiction between her earlier heterosexual promiscuity and her current conservative Christian homophobia. Do you see now, Jonas?

Of course, Rome wasn't built in a day:

i still suffer from depression, and i have to take medication for it, but god has been faithful. he's carried me through even when i thought he'd abandoned me.

God's been faithful, and so has Michelle--but unfortunately, all that fidelity is still no match for her depression. However, her ongoing depression through all five stages does not mean, as cynical blue-state liberals would no doubt want to make it mean, that her life in Christ is just as big a shambles as her life in sin. Every good red-state conservative knows that main thing isn't actually being happy in Jesus; it's believing you're happy, or at least believing that you'll be happy after you die and live with God in heaven!

Blue-state liberals care about original ideas and critical thinking; we red-state conservatives care about getting right with God

Art Green at Conservative Eyes believes strongly that "Democrats Hate People With Strong Beliefs." He explains:

When I say people with strong beliefs or convictions, that usually translates into people of faith. Usually, that is someone that is a Christian conservative. Well, why is it that way? What is it about Christians that make Democrats hate us?

How dare they believe in a Creator! How dare they believe that there is an after-life where we will meet God in Heaven! We should secede and disassociate ourselves from these 'bigots.'

Lawrence O'Donnell on the McLaughlin Group, called the red states "welfare" states and urged the blue states to secede from the red states. Geraldine Ferraro, a former Vice Presidential Candidate said on Fox News Channel's Hannity and Colmes that if the blue states seceded from the union, the red states would have no colleges or universities and that all the creativity would be in the blue states.

Well, first off, both of them are off their rockers. Secondly, when did Democrats care if people were on welfare? Aren't they the champions of the poor, exploited and underprivileged? Thirdly, where would these "creative" people get their food from? Lastly, there is plently of creativity that comes from the red states. They just now happen to live on the left coast or in New York City.

These are three very good points, and we here at Red State Rah Rah wanted to see how your typical people-with-strong-opinions-hating Democrats would respond to them, so we conducted some telephone interviews with people on the "left coast" and New York. Here are some of the answers we got (and we must apologize in advance for the strong language; blue-state liberals often use profane and vulgar terms quite freely):

"We don't hate Christians. I'm a Christian myself. We hate fucking idiots like this clown who give Christians a bad name." (Bob Wanthrax, Yonkers, New York)

"Wait, read that first part again. People with strong beliefs 'usually translate into conservative Christians'? What the fuck does that mean? Is that some kinda weird morphing shit, or something? Whoosh, people with strong beliefs, whoosh, Christians, whoosh, conservative Christians, whoosh, here comes the blue-state hate?" (Thor Jespersen, San Fransisco, California)

"Oh, poor boy. He wants so desperately to sound intelligent, doesn't he? But it just isn't working. It's kind of adorable, don't you think, how earnest he is? Write him a comment from me, could you do that? Say something encouraging, like 'Keep working on your debating skills, and one day you'll really come up with some good strong arguments!'" (Sandra Baber, Seattle, Washington)

"Hey, Art, I got a strong belief for you: you're a retard! Jesus Christ, where do these people come from?" (Pat Elster, Eugene, Oregon)

"Ha! So the big argument in favor of the red states is that they produce our food? Goddamn, that's wonderful. I love it. Seriously. All the smart creative people born there move to the coasts, and leave behind the poor mouth-breathing farmers who vote for Bush despite everything his administration has done to crush family farming: that's his attempt to make the red states look good? I mean, sheesh: what's he trying to do here, prove that red-state Bush-supporters are dumb as a sack of hammers?" (Jamal Hook, Hollywood)

"Here's the way it works, Art: Democrats are people with strong beliefs. We believe that America is a democracy where everyone has a right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness--even Arabs, atheists, and gay people. We believe that the Christian Right's zeal to legislate morality is a direct assault on core American democratic values. We believe that our strong beliefs in democratic freedoms and equal human rights are more life-affirming than the Christian Right's strong beliefs in theocratic leaders, puritanical censorship, and strict punishment for moral infractions. Democrats don't hate people with strong beliefs. Democrats hate people who want to force others to live according to one extremist group's narrow strong beliefs." (Patricia Manley, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania)

See how these things go, folks? No substantive argument from any of these arrogant elitist blue-state liberals. Just ad hominem attacks. They can't find anything solid to attack in Art's post, so they pick at his language, his argumentation, his intelligence--all incidentals. Because really, what difference does it make what anybody says or how intelligent anybody is? What matters is that you love Jesus and support George W. Bush. Everything else is just blue-state liberal elitism.